Douglas Milewski (dacuteturtle) wrote,
Douglas Milewski
dacuteturtle

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Turtle Hunters

Once upon a time, in our proud nation's past, vast herds of turtles made their way across the great plains. When they stampeded, it as if vast thunder ripped across the land. The indians would leasurely follow the great turtle herds. The clever warriors learned to stamped them down hills, where they would roll over and get stuck on their backs.

Alas, all great things come to an end. The "tortoise shell" fashion hit the eyeglasses market. Turtle Hunters snuck onto indian lands and shot turtles by the score. With the advent of the Turtle Gun, the tanklike turtle became little more than a skeets to be shot. The indians did rise up, but the uprising was short lived, as the turtle hunters hid behind the mounds of tortise shells.
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