Douglas Milewski (dacuteturtle) wrote,
Douglas Milewski

Democratic Pitch

With the elections coming up, the Democratic pitch is, "We need to raise money to counter all the money to stop all the money that GB is pumping into Maryland. We've got to stop the Republicans."

Is that it? What f**** monkey on crack did you hire as your pitch man? OMFG, that's like selling cold, dead fish so that they don't stink tomorrow. C'mon people, is it that hard to find a poet or songwriter who can put powerful ideas into short sentences?

An IDIOT could put together a better Democratic pitch. "We need to save the democratic values of America. We need people in the government who will enforce open and impartial elections, enforce the Bill of Rights, oversee the operations of the Executive branch, stop the rampant spending, and stand against torture, secret prisons, secret laws, unfair trials, and the good-old-boy network."

The Republican pitch is equally pathetic. "If the Dems get into power, they will be out-of-control and they'll ruin the country," and "Democrats are soft on terrorists." The party of ideas must have writer's block.

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